Qualities such as character, morals, respect, love and forgiveness are important to you. You want to be the best parent you can be; it isn't easy. Your schedule is overloaded, and quite frankly, you are at times exhausted and overwhelmed by life's responsibilities.

On this page you will find a few ideas to both inspire you and to help you "...knit up the raveled sleeve of care" William Shakespeare. Macbeth. Section 1 - Part C. the word 'sleep' does not appear in the quote posted here, but sleep is important too!

Life's Little Rewards...

Finding way to motivate children and adolescents isn't always easy but here are a few ideas to help you 'sweeten the deal' of parenting.

When your child follows the rules, and especially if your child is making an effort to be more compliant, these rewards show that you notice. Read more...

On a daily basis, you might try these rewards...

Serve a favorite meal or for younger children offer a special snack or dessert

Give a special Television, Computer, or Electronic Game privilege (time limited, 30 minutes, but offer it warmly.)

An extra story at bedtime for younger children

Scheduling for your child to stay up later on a weekend night

Special 'private time' with parent - the child's choice of activity

Stickers or Tokens to exchange for weekly or special treats

Special Treats that you might choose to offer

Play a board game with the family

View a special video

Have a picnic - indoor or outdoor

Have a friend over

Take in a special concert, museum, movie; go bike riding, skating, swimming, etc.

Have a camping party in the backyard

Shopping for: CDs, toys, small sports equipment

Responses to "I'm Bored!"

Boredom is a choice. Allow your child to solve this self-imposed problem independently. You may offer a general hint, such as "Do you want to do something indoors or outdoors?" "Do you you want to be noisy or quiet?" "Do you want to be alone or do something with someone else?" Be prepared for him to balk but this is part of problem-solving, too. Here are a few suggestions:

  1. Organize a game outside for friends
  2. Go to the pool or park
  3. Build a 'fort' outside
  4. Go to the library
  5. Build something: a model, a kite, or make doll clothes
  6. Bake a cake or cookies
  7. Read
  8. Invite a friend over
  9. Organize a toy, food, or school supply drive
  10. Design a new game
  11. Write a story
  12. Make a craft
  13. Learn how to solve the problem of boredom by staying bored.
  14. Volunteer to help non-profit organizations that feed the hungry or ones that provide goods and services to families


Agenda for Family Conferences

Family conferences may seem odd to those who have never tried them but they are important and can help you gain insight into situations and issues in a new way.
  1. Review the week, with each member scoring the week on a scale of 1-10. Include the successes and the near-misses, too.
  2. Use specifics to describe situations, and speak in first person. "I was upset to find that the cat had not been fed on time, Wednesday morning."
  3. Decide, as a family, any special plans or goals for the upcoming week.
  4. Once the family conference is closed, do not reopen any 'old business' or arguments. In the case of unresolved issues, call another meeting.
  5. Observe boundaries and privacy.

How to Teach the Art of Apology

Now more than ever, it is important to teach family members the art of apology. There are six important elements that comprise an apology, and they all begin with the letter "A." The source of this system is unknown.

Admit. Account. Acknowledge. Affirm. Amend. Adjust.

Admit what you did. Explain what you were trying to do (or what you were thinking) even if you were simply being careless and not thinking about the consequences of your actions. Tell the other person that you are aware of her pain and acknowledge the hurt you have cause the other person. Explain that what happened was not your intention.

After you explain and acknowledge the hurt, ask for forgiveness, affirming your desire to still be friends. Ask for forgiveness and show that you want to improve your relationship with the person you hurt. Make amends by doing something to make up for the pain you caused. Explain that your intention is to repay the person with acts of thoughtfulness or kindness to demonstrate your sincerity. Sometimes a simple, "Can we start over?" is enough. Adjust your behavior so that you can do something different the next time.